DUDE... I QUIT MY DAY JOB.

During the blizzard of January 2106, I retired from my last kitchen, relinquishing the reins of chefdom',
and headed knee deep into a storm, leaning in step by step closer to the doorway of my local watering hole.
As I drank, I wondered what to do next with my life, I realized something rather depressing.
Everything I've been doing with my life has been turning into shit.
Literally, all those meals I've struggled to make.... 
Every single dish that made it into every single mouth that I've helped to feed....
All that food was now a bunch of turds just floating aimlessly somewhere...
just like me (now kitchenless) tossing in the current making my way to an open sea.
But with my first Saturday in years all to myself, I thought to myself... "FUCK BRUNCH!"
I felt pretty good, and began thinking why not try something new and see how great or shitty it would turn out.

Since I always admired funny people, I thought maybe I'd take a stab at it- become a funny person.
So I thought I'd put down my knife for a bit and pick up a pen...
Trade in that bottle of Gruner Veltliner for a few jazz cigarettes...
Step out of a kitchen and back into a classroom.
Why not, I thought, I'll just learn a lil' comedy... because it's never too late to switch it up.
Its tough but in my spare time you'll find me at the bar... working of course- Trying to cook up some jokes!